Wednesday, 8 November 2006

Sppoky Dream...

It was April 2003 and I was just back from theatre, the operating theatre! I had slept through half the surgery. I woke towards the end. It was alright, I had an epidural and was so stoned I didn’t much care as I became aware of hammering, my flesh being pulled back in to place and stapled together. I just thought as I was stapled – he’s nearly finished… I was told prior to the surgery it was major surgery and I wasn’t too worried – I knew the anaesthesia was risky not the surgery. So I asked about that and the “pre-med”; which turned out quite well. I think during the psychedelic bit when I was seeing lots of colours I could hear the Beatles singing “Strawberry fields”. But then it was all over and I was on oxygen waiting for the feeling to come back in my lower body.

Back on the ward, despite my little sleep in theatre I nodded off again and had this very weird dream. It was very lucid. I awoke quite frightened – and convinced it would come true. Much of it was a nightmare – there were terrible things in that dream. But there were good things. I drove a car and really enjoyed it. Now we come to the weird bit! The next year, about 18 months later, I saw that same car and bought it and it is a pleasure to drive.

Then 6 months after that surgery I was back in hospital and very ill. Just as my dream had predicted! I should have took it more seriously and prepared! Then there were even darker days, which I prefer not to remember. Then when things got really bad, the memory of that dream helped. The dream had a sort of happy ending. Well, it wasn’t all bad. I knew my future was going to change dramatically.

The part of the dream that I couldn’t remember clearly but that was very important was sitting in my living room and watching television and watching the Lottery numbers come on the screen and winning! I remember it was a special draw, a super draw or rollover. But what were those damn numbers! I remembered some, but not all of them. I remembered the living room. It was totally different. There was a different television, different everything. I noticed a white radiator under the window and I didn’t have central heating then. The carpet was different. Strangely, that radiator is under the window now and I bought a new carpet and I didn’t plan that.

On Friday, it is a special lottery draw for £100,000,000 – that is a lot of money! I have an agreement that I will share any money from Euro-lottery winnings with my younger brother. Even so, £50,000,000 is still a lot of money! But what were the numbers? Is this the right lottery? The sun was shining in the dream and I don’t even think they put the Euro-lottery draw on TV! But we don’t play every week, just occasionally. We save up the money and have a go when the jackpot is high! This is certainly high! I must have a go…..

I went to the web site and started to put the first number in and it did it itself. It was Google doing it from my last attempt. So I just went along with the numbers Google picked! It was sort of ones I had had before and it included the ones I could remember from my dream! Will we win? Who knows?

What if? What if we won? I think it would ruin my brother – he would probably have a Ferrari and a big house and all that stuff! I’ll stay here and swear him to secrecy. I fancy being a philanthropist if I have £50,000,000. I have spent my life trying to help people without much money to help. My health isn’t good so I’d spend some money on that if I can. My health is my top priority. But I would want to bring a little justice to people who suffer everyday from discrimination, bullying and abuse. The disabled, chronically sick, children and the elderly would be a priority.

Some bureaucrats and paper pushers annoy me – but I suppose a good firm of lawyers will take care of those for me. Wouldn’t that be wonderful! Free from bureaucracy at last – everyone’s dream! Of course I would improve my technology and maybe hire a technologist to teach me how to do html and design web sites properly and lots of other things. There is lots of software that I would like too. I would start a new website that I’ve had in mind for a long time. I think it would be very successful. I’ve tried to get a large company interested but they just send you a standard reply or refer you to another department. It would be good to start a small IT company and some guy and girls that know computers and can make my ideas a reality. It would be watch out – here we come – with a few million invested we could take the Internet by storm! Lol

But the most important thing isn’t money, its emotional security and good health. Money may help me get better health care. But would people care more about me if I had millions of pounds. They may pretend to care more or avoid me for fear I would think they were interested in my money. I suppose they may care more if I could use the money to show how much I care about the community I live in and the people of this world I live in. How much I care about this Internet community that I belong to – even though it has its bad guys.

I will see what happens on Friday! In the meantime don’t forget my tiny website I’m not the greatest webmaster – but my site is certainly unusual!